Wednesday, September 16, 2015

I Suck at Being a Blogger...and That's Okay

I haven't written in ages. I've been struggling this year. Mentally, physically, emotionally, it's been a long and busy one.
I am semi consistent with running the Facebook page. I interact as best I can. My house is always a disaster. I frequently bail on social gatherings and outings. I use television to occupy my toddler while I nap. We eat a lot of crockpot and no effort meals.
I will say it. I have 3 chronic illnesses and life is hard. So who's brilliant idea was it to try and be a blogger?? Oh, yeah. That was mine. I started FMIFABA to reach out, to connect. And I have. I've wanted to be a writer since the 3rd grade. And I am. I am a writer because I write when I can. I write down ideas, prompts, quotes, character sketches. I will use them one day. I have met people thru the Facebook page that I treasure my relationships with. I learn new things every day from them. How to cope, how to communicate, how to present, how to survive. I am doing what I can to be the best wife, mother, church member, friend, sister, I can be.
I will write the pieces in my head. But I will give myself a break. I will forgive myself for my failings. I will do my best.
I am a terrible blogger...but an awesome Chronic Illness Warrior.

And that's Okay.

~KK~

Tuesday, January 27, 2015

Welcome, Welcome

I figured since I set up a Facebook page under personal blog, that I should probably have an actual blog to go with it. I always meant to start one up, but in the midst of the Balancing Act, I totally spaced. Let me start by introducing myself. I go by ~KK~ and I run the page and the blog. I am 28, married for time and eternity to Hubby, we are practicing Latter-Day Saints, or Mormons, we share our home and family life with Sissy, who helps coparent our little miss, The Princess, who is one year old. We live in Idaho. A little about me, so you understand the whole point and purpose of the page and the blog. I was diagnosed with Bipolar type 2 when I was 16, with severe social anxiety and panic attacks. I later added OCD, mild agoraphobia, Binge Eating DIsorder, and Borderline Personality Disorder to the mix. When I was 20, I was diagnosed with fibromyalgia, Chronic Fatigue, and osteoarthritis. This massively screwy combo of DXs has made life an interesting journey. I struggled a lot as a teen and young adult. I struggled with my emotions, my physical limitations, and my sexuality. Sissy helped me find my way in life, learn what I needed to learn to cope as a functioning member of society. And when the Lord saw fit, he tossed a tall Idaho redneck in my path and told me to marry the fool. And who am I to go against such strong promptings? We've been married almost 3 years now and couldn't be happier. I've struggled to hold down jobs with my health and anxiety issues, but lucky for me, Hubby and Sissy have awesome jobs that make us a 2 income family with a stay-at-home-mom. I am a dedicated flybaby, conquering CHAOS one baby step at a time, as well as an aspiring writer and poet. I make jewelry in my spare time (you parents out there will laugh...what is free time with a toddler under foot???) and I struggle every day with my health, emotions, and self image. I am a real life person, down to earth, run-of-the-mill. My life is pretty much an open book. I work every day to promote awareness, break stigma, and bring invisible illnesses to light. That is my main goal with this blog. I want to share my stories, my struggles. I want to show people that the mentally ill are not always to be feared. I want to prove that people with chronic illnesses are not lazy. I want to make the world and the LDS Church aware that same-sex attraction is not a problem only had by men and boys in the Church, as is so glaringly shown in the literature and treatment. If you are still reading this, good for you. I plan to post weekly on the blog and daily on the page, as parenting and health permits. Thank you for taking time to get to know me. I look forward to getting to know you, as we travel this road together. ~KK~